Monday 8 January 2018

YOGHURT ALERT OR, THE SNOWS OF YESTERYEAR


HAPPY NEW YEAR TO ALL!

Here's a bit of harmless satire about the fate of a yoghurt called Snowy (or Sno)


 


YOGHURT ALERT

Sno thrived till Supermarket said one day:
Now Snowy, I’m afraid you’ll have to say
Hello with cash, in other words, to pay
what’s called Hello Money, if you’re to stay.
And there are Seven Snow-White Yoghurts keen
to supplant you, take your place as Yoghurt Queen.
And very cultured yoghurts they are, too,
maybe not better but as good as you
and ready to fork out the wampum. Who
knows any difference between one snow
and another, pines for last year’s snow?
Either you pay the dough we call HelIo,
or be frozen yoghurt if you answer No –
and I mean frozen out, not kept in freezers,
no longer in demand from gals or geezers.
And we’ll say Hello, money! when we see
all brands are equal in the buyer’s eye. 
In other words, if you’re gone, ma cherie,
Jill or Jack Soap will take the one that’s here,
won’t comb the town when a few small tubs are plenty.
Rejoicing in the perceived identity
of all yoghurts, including you, dear Sno,
I have to tell you that without Hello
Money to pay a sweetener, you must go.


© Ciaran O'Driscoll, 2018





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